"Growth means change and change involves risk, stepping from the known to the unknown" - Author Unknown -

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Journal entry Aug 6/10

   Morning Jesus.  What a beautiful day; I came in from my shop even though it wasn't coffee time yet. Jesus I just want to say thank You again. I had a chance to share a bit with Ray last night and I am so grateful for what You have done and are doing with me. I love You so much.


   Where are we? Okay, good... I was just checking :) I am content to remain with You forever. Badly worded... I desperately want to remain in Your arms forever. :) There are some wonderings I have... Why did Tyrah ask me that question in the exact words that Chantal used so long ago? Why don't you ever share? (in I Cor. 14 time) What am I to share? I will... tune my ears into what You'd have me share. Let me know and catch it. I love You.

   Oh I think I need to write down my dream last night... it was my Dad. I was with him in his hospital bed but he was much more coherent and I tried to tell him that I was there and loved him and I remember him holding my hand.  My mom came in and she was watching me at the end of the bed and asked if I was awake. I realized I wasn't so I woke up (although not really).  We were still there with Dad and we talked and remembered stuff (but I know some of it wasn't real).

   I remember waking up (for real this time) and thinking that because You have washed some of the distractions off me that I was able to have another dream about my Dad. Some more feelings I guess. The last dream I had of him was such a heart breaker but good one at the same time. I remember just sobbing because I didn't have a chance to really say goodbye and I was given the chance to be wrapped up in his arms (he was very healthy) and cry out my hurt and tell him I loved him. Then I didn't have anymore Dad dreams so I wondered if I ever would again. Hmmm.

   I am at the tail end of the day and so very much in love with You Jesus that several times today I just couldn't contain all that I felt. It felt really good. It was so, so good to laugh with Rick too. Well I think I will work on the worship set so what do You want to say with it?

"Hey now this is my desire...
consume me like a fire...
cause I just want

something beautiful

to touch me.."

need to breathe
'something beautiful'

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