Morning Jesus, Yesterday was a really wild day for sure. Going to places that I didn't know why except that I felt You were asking me to.... even having them closed. Feeling that strong call to pray for the body of Christ... just a real good day for sure. Even though I went from shopping to getting home to working to soccer to journalling to bed there was a sense yesterday of purpose and rest... I felt like I spent the day listening and that felt really really good. Hmmmm.

A mighty windstorm hit the mountain but the LORD was not in the wind after the wind there was a earthquake but the LORD was not in the earthquake... after the earthquake there was a fire but the LORD was not in the fire and after the fire there was a a sound of a gentle whisper ... the LORD was in a whisper... I really think that after a day like yesterday this is delightfully true. Yes I can see how people get enamoured with the idea that You need to present big and dramatic and powerfully... but in the gentle whisper we fall broken. Never to rise the same again. You gently call us to come, to turn, to open up that door... Why must we be like Naaman whose pride was insulted that he was not met and asked to do some great thing to gain healing... and he actually turned away refusing to be healed. It wasn't what he expected or thought was on his level of importance... was it snatched away from him? Because he turned his back, did he nullify the offer? No, God continued to speak to him... through the gentle urgings of his servants that saw the truth of the situation and oh so gently challenged him... he turned.

This day will we spurn the voice of God not believing that He speaks to us all the time? ... often in an unglamorous way... in a gentle whisper. Quit looking around at others, quit comparing yourself to others and what they will think and see and speak of ... look to Jesus and let Him be Your all... let Him reveal Himself to You as He so desperately desires... and it may be in the quietest, smallest way but when we heed, we connect and we are humbled and on the knees of our soul... we cry out "Ahhhhh... Lord God... You are real! You are so wildly loving ... You are my God." You reveal truth, convict, breakdown, transform, renew, You challenge our lives, our faith, our way of thinking, our heart's perspective and desires... You... with a whisper... You... and it isn't a one time deal. You continually call our names, You continually speak and reach out... don't leave an experience of connecting with Jesus as a once in a lifetime deal... no build your life upon learning to connect with Him all the time... no matter where, no matter when... He's there, He's faithful... He's real.

I love You Jesus so so deeply please keep me in Your arms. Please help my ears to hear. Please don't let me wander away. I love You. I want You , I need You alone.

P.S. I went back and read what I posted before and I was faced with ... obvious flaws in how I looked at Sunday. It wasn't about me speaking well... it was about me needing to be closer to You so that You could speak through me. I see over and over how much I need You. I don't think I ever want to leave that state though... I will never 'arrive'... I will continue to be humbled over and over at how much more I need You than I realized the moment before... I am giving You myself ever flawed but claimed as Yours... I surrender my life my all... I can not do with myself the absolutely delightful things You can in just being willing to love me and spend Your time with me. You so humble and send me into such awe at Your willingness to love me.