"Growth means change and change involves risk, stepping from the known to the unknown" - Author Unknown -

Monday, October 28, 2013

I am all in

Journal excerpt... Jan18/13

   I am quite captured by our place on the ridge line even if my discipline fails me and I keep having to refocus to stay there.  Even now I am flitting around doing other details instead of sitting still... it is like I crave Your presence so much that I am overwhelmed, so deeply that I am scared to start or be still to receive.
   I am all in Jesus.  Every moment I know I am not with You I feel time has warped ahead and left me so far behind that a night is like a week. (thank you Lifehouse)  But there is a certain helplessness felt in that.  A desperation I suppose or despair even.
Please don't leave me here Jesus.  
But I haven't... I am holding your hand... I am sitting on a ridge line with you leaning against my legs ... we are face to face.
Why am I not hearing You?
Haha really?
Hahaha You know what I mean!  We dissolve into a laughter of absurdness and release for a moment but I take a deep breath in and ask what.?




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