Oct. 24/12 Journal entry.
Hey my Jesus... I have been with You today in new and good ways... and I don't want it to end, ever. I want to learn to just be still and open with You. To share being with no expectation. Anticipation I suspect but nothing else. Hmmm. I need You to really live. That is so true. More true than I knew even 24 hours ago.
So here I am with the echo of Your words in my ear. "Don't over think it, just do it."
It makes me laugh actually (at myself). Simple.
I turn and face You, my laughter still in my eyes and smile.
You delight me Jesus.
You laugh... you delight me too.
Huh. I step into Your arms for a hug (without the intent of ever stopping) I hear a familiar hum in Your chest, one of contentment and peace. I love that.
We now sit together by the river's edge our feet dangling into the water.
What would you think if I pushed you into the water?
hahaha what???? are you allowed to do that? hahaha
I see your sparkly eyes just before I am suddenly splashing into the river's water! I yell out a hey but am promptly submerged and excitedly swimming along with the current. I look left and right to catch a sight of You cause I know You are here! Sure enough You come alongside me and grab hold of me and we spin in a circle as we speed through the water. HAHAHA! I grab Your hand and kiss it Thank You Jesus, thank You so much. I cannot describe adequately just how at peace I am right now... I now shift to hold onto Your shoulders and am pulled along with You... it is good to be so close.
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
Monday, March 18, 2013
The brick alley
Oct 4/12 Journal excerpt...
Jesus I haven't been here in so long. I need to get back to meeting with You just to be with You. Jesus I almost forget how to slow down in my head I need to rermember I am on borrowed time today... it is a morning of bonus time. Thank You for that. I keep having all these random thoughts in my head ugh. Perhaps we should meet somewhere?
How about in the four way intersection of this curious alley... all the brick walls of the surrounding buildings climb up and up yet in the center of the intersection is a tree and light is streaming down one of the alleys onto it. It is out of place but it isn't. There is a chair near the tree, a plain wooden affair. I know to do nothing else so I approach it... sitting down I draw in a deep breath. My chair and I are facing directly into the sun and it feels so good. It must be the morning sun for it is coming in low and there is less heat but more beauty.
Truth has a black and white element to it, abrupt, stark and sometimes harsh or disturbing in it's realization. Truth has earthy tones to it as well... comforting, secure, inviting, all encompassing. I know there are more colors but today this is all I see. I close my eyes and watch the sunlight dance behind my eyelids... and I open my hands in a purposeful way.
Jesus I haven't been here in so long. I need to get back to meeting with You just to be with You. Jesus I almost forget how to slow down in my head I need to rermember I am on borrowed time today... it is a morning of bonus time. Thank You for that. I keep having all these random thoughts in my head ugh. Perhaps we should meet somewhere?
How about in the four way intersection of this curious alley... all the brick walls of the surrounding buildings climb up and up yet in the center of the intersection is a tree and light is streaming down one of the alleys onto it. It is out of place but it isn't. There is a chair near the tree, a plain wooden affair. I know to do nothing else so I approach it... sitting down I draw in a deep breath. My chair and I are facing directly into the sun and it feels so good. It must be the morning sun for it is coming in low and there is less heat but more beauty.
Truth.
Truth has a black and white element to it, abrupt, stark and sometimes harsh or disturbing in it's realization. Truth has earthy tones to it as well... comforting, secure, inviting, all encompassing. I know there are more colors but today this is all I see. I close my eyes and watch the sunlight dance behind my eyelids... and I open my hands in a purposeful way.
a prodigal returns
Oct 15/12
Jesus I feel like a beginner. I haven't been writing in so long or with any discipline and I know that it has it's consequences. I wondered if I might just type into it today... ramble until I am able to connect with You again. So here I am. I just wanted to tell You that I love You. What are we up to today?
Thankful list
for bedtime, for Bailey enjoying paintball, for Jesse winning a tournament, for KC's good job watching out for Bailey and Jesse, for work, for blue sky and beautiful mountains, for ice fields, for friendly people, for Your perfectly timed Scripture, for the IPad, for fire in my shop and a mild morning, for quiet, for tea, for music, for freedom.
There is something beautiful in living each moment or each day unto itself. To stop for that brief time to plan or schedule worry or obsess. Instead to sing loud ridiculously loud being thankful under my breath that I am working at that moment with power tools lol. To follow a nudge and be totally engaged in it. To feel. To see. I wonder if in the rest of my life I can endeavor to link more and more of these moments together. I wonder.
So now just before making supper I want to come and say hey. Life is curious so different for each of us really another cannot suppose he even knows or understands what another goes through. I miss sitting with You Jesus. I miss being close. What else do I have but You. Even the sun means nothing without You.
What's wrong with my hearing? what to make for supper?....
Jesus I feel like a beginner. I haven't been writing in so long or with any discipline and I know that it has it's consequences. I wondered if I might just type into it today... ramble until I am able to connect with You again. So here I am. I just wanted to tell You that I love You. What are we up to today?
Thankful list
for bedtime, for Bailey enjoying paintball, for Jesse winning a tournament, for KC's good job watching out for Bailey and Jesse, for work, for blue sky and beautiful mountains, for ice fields, for friendly people, for Your perfectly timed Scripture, for the IPad, for fire in my shop and a mild morning, for quiet, for tea, for music, for freedom.
There is something beautiful in living each moment or each day unto itself. To stop for that brief time to plan or schedule worry or obsess. Instead to sing loud ridiculously loud being thankful under my breath that I am working at that moment with power tools lol. To follow a nudge and be totally engaged in it. To feel. To see. I wonder if in the rest of my life I can endeavor to link more and more of these moments together. I wonder.
So now just before making supper I want to come and say hey. Life is curious so different for each of us really another cannot suppose he even knows or understands what another goes through. I miss sitting with You Jesus. I miss being close. What else do I have but You. Even the sun means nothing without You.
What's wrong with my hearing? what to make for supper?....
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